Great Software: MS Paint

MS Paint is awesome!

Its total awesomeness is most fully described at Uncyclopedia, complete with examples of the visual wonder that can be achieved with it.

For me, its pure brilliance was best summed up by its makers, the mighty Microsoft, on their Help page (the image, possibly designed with the very product) on their website. Having ascertained that you can't zoom out, I was asked:

When it came to expressing my thoughts, it really did leave me speechless.

Waiting, Waiting...

I should have known we'd still be waiting to find out who'll be running the country. After all, it took me an hour to vote on Saturday. Apparently someone had forgotten to bring the electoral rolls. You can only wonder. I ask the blankly smiling people with their "Moving Australia Forward" t-shirts if they could start by moving the queue forward. What is it with these volunteers anyway? Don't they realise that their unquestioning enthusiasm comes across like religious zealotry? And I don't talk to those people either! Actually that is an important election tip - always wear headphones (even if they're not connected to anything) to discourage people handing out their rubbish.

To add insult to injury, after queuing for the hour, the guy then asks you if you've voted anywhere else. The polls have only been open for the same hour I've been standing in line. How the hell could I have voted anywhere else?

I am however, forced to spare a thought for 2 other lots of people waiting for much, much longer.

Firstly, 33 miners trapped in Chile, having been found alive days after they had been given up for dead, are now waiting for a relief tunnel to be drilled. The piece of equipment is being sent out there from Australia and according to the news yesterday, they should be out in a few months. Months! They're also having to get NASA to help with getting them food. Hopefully, this will be one of the great survival stories of the year.

Secondly, and on a completely more surreal note, I also heard about people stuck in a traffic jam in China for 9 days. Nine days! Where are they going? Is it still worth going there? I mean if you'd been commuting, you've already missed 2 weeks of work (not to mention the weekend) - you've probably been fired for not showing up! It's like that episode of Dr Who where everyone is just driving around under New York for years. Just wait until everyone in China has a car...

Wrong Song

Had to make a call the other night and just grabbed a CD at random from the bookshelf before making it (I like to set a mood however random it may be). When I say random, obviously I didn't want to put on anything that was likely to drown out the conversation.

Glancing at the selected album, Beatles For Sale, it seemed to be suitable for not drowning out the conversation.

As the phone rang and rang, the first song "No Reply" seemed strangely apt. A wait, another unanswered dial and then "I'm A Loser" chimed through the speakers. One more try I figured. By now "Baby's In Black" had come on with its fateful "Oh dear what can I do? Baby's in black and I'm feeling blue" line and I decided perhaps there's a message here.

It's a great album but don't use it when making a phone call.

Broad Banned

It's hard to understand why everybody's getting in such a lather over which broadband solution is best.

By the time they've finished filtering what we can see on it, it will hardly matter.